solved it now.
you need 2 relays on each side,one lowbeam and one highbeam and a separate Earth to chassi. put lowbeam to constant Power in the headlight socket, it will switch of anyway from the lightswitch.
but you still need a relay for the lowbeam to make the blue indicator in the instrument to work properly, on that relay you leave the lowbeam output empty pin 87.
make it on both sides and it will work.
Daniel